Dell Venue 8 Pro 5855 replacement tablet is so slow I can't do anything with it.

I have been fighting with Dell for the last year regarding a tablet that I purchased from the Dell Outlet.  The tablet was a Dell Venue 10 7040 that was purchased October 6th of 2015.  I had the tablet sent in to the repair department at Dell two separate times for repairs, and still had issues.  The tablet was then sent in to get a replacement.  That tablet lasted a few months, and started running deathly slow again.  I contacted Dell, and after over a month of dealing with HORRIFIC customer service, I was finally granted permission to have another tablet sent out to me.  I refused to send the tablet in to be repaired for a third time in under a year considering the company was unable to fix it the two previous times.  Only after telling the corporate representative that I would be filing a claim in small claims court to recoup my costs did he finally offer me another tablet.  He sent me a Dell Venue 8 Pro 5855.  This tablet is ridiculously slow.  When I say slow, I mean impossible to even use.  It takes 15 seconds at a minimum to do anything after pressing the power button, even when only in standby.  The touch inputs take 10 to sometimes 45 seconds to actually register and do anything. The Bluetooth keyboard I use is completely impossible to use.  I finally got the tablet started up, and have Windows Update open right now.  It's sat for 15 minutes "checking for updates," and I can't get any further.  The Dell update app scans for 15-30 minutes and always comes back with an error telling me to contact technical support. 

It took me over a month of dealing with the Corporate Resolution Center to finally get this tablet.  Now, it is past my 1 year warranty on my original tablet.  I was told by the Corporate Representative (Shawn Arandale) that this tablet was new and would include the brand new factory warranty with it.  I am completely at my wit's end. 

Who can I contact to actually get something accomplished?  I'm tired of never getting calls back from the customer support team.  I'm tired of never getting emails replied to. I'm tired of spending HOURS on the phones, just to be told that they have no clue what is going on and don't know the direction forward.  I'm tired of being transferred between agents, spending hours on hold only to be transferred to another agent and sitting on hold again.

Who can I contact here in the US that actually knows what they are talking about?  I would like to speak to someone that speaks English as their native language.  I want to speak with someone that actually has a brain, and doesn't just repeat word tracks and never answer any questions. I spent well over $500 on a tablet over a year ago and have yet to get anything that functions even remotely as it was claimed to function. 

Now, I have a ton of different reference numbers that never seem to get me anywhere with the customer support representatives.  They are as follows:

Service tag of the replacement Dell Venue 10 I received a few months ago - 1VPBT22

Service tag of the Dell Venue 8 Pro that was sent to replace my tablet - HQNZ2C2

Most recent incident number: 34884272

Dispatch number given to order me the Dell Venue 8 Pro - 321572393

An older Incident number for repair or replacement of the Dell Venue 10 - 33612540

Another older incident number for repair or replacement of the Dell Venue 10 - 33477669

Original order number for my Dell Venue 10 - 898008228

As I'm sure you are realizing, this has been an absolute travesty.  I have tried to give Dell EVERY opportunity to make this right and take care of me.  I have  talked to several people, and can't ever get straight answers.  Even the Corporate Resolution Center representative (Shawn Arandale) told me that he was taking time to make sure the replacement Dell Venue 8 Pro was in stock and ready to ship so that he could give me definite dates and information as to when I would get the replacement.  Then, when he told me it was, he claimed again that it was still being manufactured and hadn't even arrived in the US yet.  Then, the tablet showed up at my home.  If the Corporate Representative isn't even able to track where a replacement item is, how can he even be considered a corporate representative?  He has repeatedly not answered my phone calls and messages.  He has repeatedly told me that there are no other points of contact with the company, and that he had no boss.  I am never able to contact anyone that seems to care at all about the customer.  Nobody that I have talked to thus far will give any concrete answers.  It's as if they just drag everything out as far as possible to get past the warranty period, then tell the customer that we're on our own. 

I am very close to just filing a claim in small claims court against Dell, so that I can actually talk to someone face to face about this issue.  It seems that this is the only option to deal with a competent person. 

Can anyone here help me out with this?  I would settle for figuring out what's going on with the Venue 8 tablet I got to make it usable.  I'm really not a difficult person to satisfy. I just expect to get what I was told I would get. 

Will someone please help me?